


No Mercy

by nah_she_didnt



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Lily / Sirius friendship, M/M, Marauders, The Order of the Phoenix - Freeform, first wizarding war, marauders fic, poor babies, side jily, side wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 08:27:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28685583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nah_she_didnt/pseuds/nah_she_didnt
Summary: The Order of the Phoenix embarks on a dangerous mission, but Lily's moment of weakness may cost her best friends their lives.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27





	No Mercy

**Author's Note:**

> A bit of good old-fashioned first war angst. Thanks to The_Dream_Team for editing!

The members of the Order of the Phoenix sat in near total silence around a long mahogany table. Every now and then someone would mutter something under their breath to the person in the seat next to them, but most stayed completely quiet. A cloud of anxiety hung heavily over them, filling their lungs, their nostrils, and their hearts with doubt. No amount of strategizing sessions or dueling practice could prepare them for what lay in store this evening. 

James only noticed that he was bouncing his leg nervously when Lily stretched out her hand and rested it on his knee. He looked at her, wondering how she could stay so calm. Lily never seemed nervous before raids like these. She was always cool and collected, like she’d been preparing for the moment all her life, which she probably had done, being a muggle born. “I love you,” he mouthed silently to her. She nodded imperceptibly. She knew. 

All of a sudden the door to the meeting room of headquarters banged open. The table’s inhabitants all jumped. Albus Dumbledore and Mad-Eye Moody strode into the room. Both men looked grim and tired, as if they had missed several nights of sleep. James sat a little straighter in his chair and glanced across the table at Sirius. He looked wan, staring at the table where he held Remus’ hand so tight that his knuckles turned white. 

Dumbledore took his place at the head of the table, placed his fingertips on the tabletop, and surveyed the group. The only sound in the room was the gentle patter of rain against the high, stained glass windows. 

“Tonight you will embark on a mission that is both highly dangerous and absolutely essential to defeating Lord Voldemort,” Dumbledore began with a steady voice, “your task is to identify and capture Evan Rosier, a high-ranking member of the Ministry of Magic and second lieutenant to Voldemort. We’ve received intelligence that Rosier is to attend a meeting at Malfoy Manor tonight. As you know, his capture will greatly weaken Voldemort’s cause within the Ministry, and will make ending his reign of terror that much simpler.” These words were met with silence. 

“You will break into two teams. The vanguard will sweep the premises for Death Eater activity and neutralize any enemies on the ground. Support will provide backup and further neutralize captured targets by stunning them and removing their wands. I will now allow Alastor to hand out partner assignments, Alastor, if you please,” 

Moody got clumsily to his feet. He was clearly not yet used to his new leg. He removed a crumpled piece of parchment from his coat pocket, smoothed it on the table, and squinted down at it. “Right,” he said gruffly, “first Vanguard partners are as follows. Potter and Lupin,” James’s head snapped up to look at Lupin, who grimaced at him, “Black and Evans,” Lily smiled weakly at Sirius who nodded at her across the table. 

James felt his heart sink. Of course they split up the couples, they were too much of a liability together, he thought to himself as Moody read off the rest of the teams. Lily and Sirius were two of the most gifted duelers in the room, but something about the two most important people in the world to him fighting together made him nervous. What if something went wrong? 

Moody finished reading his list of names. The nervous energy in the room had reached a peak. Now that they knew who they were to fight with, the Order was ready. James’ body seemed to vibrate with anticipation, his hand itching for the wand in his pocket. If he had to sit still for one more moment he thought that he would scream. 

“We depart in exactly ten minutes,” growled Moody, “take a moment, check in with each other, then make your way to the property line and prepare to disapparate.” For a few seconds no one moved. They all knew what Moody meant by “take a moment.” They knew that one or more of them might not come back. 

\--

Sirius sat motionless. He felt oddly calm and ready to burst from his own skin at the same time. He went over the plan quickly in his head. Enter through the right wing of the basement, silent as a mouse. He knew how to take his corners, how to listen for the pacing feet of guards or the faint crackle in the air that meant curses hung there. He was prepared as he could be, but he was also scared shitless. 

Remus nudged his knee with his own. “Hey,” he breathed, “you okay?” 

Sirius nudged him back, “of course. These Death Eater prats can’t scare me.” It was a lie, and Remus knew it, but he smiled anyway. 

“You’ll be alright, yeah? Don’t do anything stupid.”

“Name one time I tried to do something stupid.” 

“The time you tried to wrestle Devil’s Snare because it was a ‘punk ass bitch.’“ 

“Alright, fair. But I swear on McGonagall that I won’t do anything stupid tonight.” 

“Good boy,” Remus said with a forced smile. He knew that there was little he could do to keep Sirius out of trouble. 

“Alright lads?” said Peter anxiously. Sirius knew was secretly relieved to be excluded from the vanguard. He may have had a knack for sneaking in unnoticed but he was a less experienced dueler than his friends. 

Sirius clapped a hand on Peter’s back. “We’re grand, aren’t we Moony? Ready to kick some blood-supremacist arse?” 

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” 

Sirius strode across the room to Lily, his mission partner. “Ready, Red?” 

Lily took a deep breath, then nodded. She turned to James, looking as if she were about to speak, but before she could get a word out he had enveloped her in a massive hug. “Promise you’ll look after yourself?” Sirius heard him murmur into her hair. Lily nodded, “you too.” 

They broke apart, and James turned to Sirius. “Look out for her, yeah?”

“James,” Lily scoffed, “that’s some absurd male bullshit, even for you.” 

James smiled at her admonishment. “And you make sure to look out for him too! I want you both back here without a scratch in twenty five minutes, alright?” 

Sirius didn’t say anything, but pulled James into a hug, which he reciprocated. When they broke apart and Lily and James said goodbye to Peter, Sirius shot Remus one last look. He tried to say something, anything, to convey his fear to Remus, but Remus just shook his head. “Nothing stupid, remember?” 

“Alright, you lot,” bellowed Moody from the doorway, “move out!” 

\--

Lily, Sirius, Dorcas, and Peter crept silently through the wet grass outside Malfoy Manor. Lily cursed herself internally for not casting a repelling charm on her sneakers before leaving headquarters as her shoes squelched into the soft mud below. 

The four of them were on high alert. They were about forty yards away from the house, which meant that they were prime defensive charm territory. Once Sirius stopped the group by holding up his hand, waved his wand in a complicated series of movements, and managed to tear a hole in the patchwork of spells that guarded the house. Lily was grateful to him, but did not exhale the breath she was holding in her chest. There were still ample opportunities for the plan to go wrong. 

The group reached the door to the basement kitchens, then huddled together. 

“Right,” Lily whispered as quietly as she could, “Peter, Dorcas, remember. Lock the door behind us, stand guard, then follow in ten minutes.”

“Yeah, yeah,” said Dorcas impatiently, “go on, show off. Make sure to leave us plenty of prisoners.” Lily laughed softly, squeezing Dorcas’ hand one last time before turning to the locked door. She and Sirius worked non-verbally for a few minutes to turn the lock until they finally succeeded and made their way inside the house. 

The hallway was pitch black, except for a few weak rays of moonlight that fell through small window panes that lined the hall. Lily knew better than to cast Lumos so, with a nod from Sirius, they proceeded down the hallway in the dark. 

Every corner presented the opportunity for a trap. Every shadow was an enemy lying in wait. Lily nearly had a heart attack when Sirius had clutched her arm at a high-pitched noise that turned out to be a small mouse. She made a mental note to take the mickey when they arrived back at headquarters. 

They had just reached the end of the corridor when they both froze. Footsteps paced on the other side of the door, surely a guard set to stop any intruders from accessing the stairs to the main floor. Sirius motioned to Lily I’ll get the door, you stun. She nodded and arranged herself into her fighting stance. Her attack had to be swift and silent to avoid alerting anyone to their presence. 

Sirius looked her in the eye. One, two...three! He pointed his wand and non verbally flung the door open. Before she could see who was on the other side, She threw a silent stunner through the doorway. Lily heard a large body hit the floor. She scrambled through the doorway and looked down at the Death Eater. His mask covered his face, but he was clearly stunned. They left the guard lying in the doorway for Dorcas and Peter, Sirius casting a body-bind curse at him for good measure. Lily felt herself flush at her success. It was a small victory, and the rest of the mission was sure to be much more difficult, but she had managed to make one thing go right so far. 

She and Sirius began to climb the stairs that, according to the plans Moody had shown them, led to a door that opened into the entrance hall on the main floor. Lily knew that this was where they would find the most Death Eaters. With any luck, James and Remus would be climbing the identical staircase on the other side of the hall, ready to help them surprise any guards in the hall with a sneak-attack. 

They reached the top of the stairs and stood in front of the door, almost uncertain. Sirius gestured once again to Lily, but this time he wanted her to open the door and attack first. She nodded, and once again on the silent count of three the door burst open. Sirius, wand raised, darted into the hall, ready to stun and fight and even kill if necessary. 

The hall was completely empty. 

Sirius almost lowered his wand, shock etched in every line on his face. Lily frowned. This wasn’t right. The hall led directly into the parlor, where Rosier and the other lieutenants met to plan their attacks. The hall should be full of Death Eaters there to protect their commanding officers. 

Lily looked at Sirius, who stared back. “What’s happening?” 

“I don’t-” suddenly the hall was filled with the sound of a voice screeching, “Avada kedavera!" 

Lily dragged Sirius to the ground as a vase exploded above their heads. Three hooded figures stood on the landing above, but just as Lily had just started to get her bearings again, they disapparated and reappeared in the hall in front of them. Sirius was already back on his feet sending stunning spells at two of them. She scrambled up to cover his left flank and shot a body-bind curse at the third. The figure blocked her curse, but did not send back one of his own. She used his moment of hesitation to advance, pushing him back further into the hall. 

Sirius managed to bring down one of the Death Eaters with a well-placed stunner, then turned his full attention to the second of the two. Lily continued to throw spell after spell at her Death Eater, but he just blocked them all. “Come on!” she screamed, swiping her wand through the air with vicious speed.

Stupefy, stupefy, reducto, patrificus totalus, one spell after the next at the speed of light, and still the Death Eater retreated. “Fight back, you Coward!” she screamed at him. Finally, after her stinging hex missed him by inches, the Death Eater froze. Next to her, Sirius took down his second Death Eater and turned to watch. Lily’s opponent reached up to his face and slowly pulled his hood down to reveal himself. 

It was Sev. 

The next moment seemed to stretch into several slow-motion minutes. Lily heard Sirius roar in anger beside her, but stood rooted to the spot. Her blood began to boil at the sight of Sev. Her former friend. The boy who taught her all about Hogwarts. The boy who brought her chocolate frogs and The Daily Prophet before she even got her letter. The boy who humiliated her in front of the entire school. Lily pointed her wand directly between her former friend’s eyes. Any second now, she told herself, she would hex him. 

Then, two things happened in quick succession. James and Remus burst into the hall, probably at the sound of Sirius’ yell. They stared dumbstruck at the scene before them, Lily pointing her wand into Snape’s face. Then, the air was once again full of screams and curses. Two more Death Eaters appeared on the landing and began firing curses at them from above. One of the Death Eaters hit Sirius right in the chest with a flash of purple light, sending his limp body skidding across the floor. 

Remus screamed. 

Lily realized that she was still pointing her wand at Sev and quickly stunned him. She tried not to listen to the sound of his body hitting the cold marble floor. She turned to see James dueling both new aerial attackers while Remus ran to Sirius’ motionless form. She ran to join James in dueling the Death Eaters. 

Suddenly, new and familiar figures began to fill the hall. Alice Longbottom and Fabian Prewett appeared from a staircase leading from one of the upper floors. Lily saw Alice sprint to Sirius’ body, grab him by the arm, and disapperate with a loud crack. Fabian had already taken out one of the Death Eaters and was furiously dueling the other. 

Lily seized the opportunity to pull James behind a pillar. 

“We have to run,” Lily panted, “it was a trap, there isn’t any meeting tonight!” 

James nodded quickly, scanning the room behind Lily. “You go now, I’m going to get Remus.” 

“But-” 

“Go!” 

She relented and turned on the spot. She felt her body being pulled through nothingness until finally she stopped in the grass outside headquarters. She landed clumsily, slamming the back of her head into the ground. She thought, stupidly, that this wouldn’t have hurt so much if she had hit the muddy ground outside Malfoy Manor. 

Alice ran over to her and pulled her up by her elbow. “What happened?” 

Lily blinked rapidly. She still felt dazed from apparition and her head ached. “I dunno. there was no meeting, just guards. Someone needs to warn Support to get out, now. Wait, no, tell them, James and Remus-” but just as she spoke James, Remus, and Fabian apparated onto the scene and fell to the ground in a tangle of limbs. Remus immediately sprang to his feet, staring around madly. He grabbed Alice by the wrist. 

“Where’s Sirius?” 

“Calm down, Lupin-” Fabian ordered, pulling Remus back so that Alice was beyond his reach. 

“WHERE IS SIRIUS?” he screamed, spitting madly, his eyes wild with terror.

Fabian seized him by the shoulders. “Get a grip, he’s going to be fine. Right, Alice?” he asked.

Alice nodded. “I already took him up to the house. He’s fine, Remus, just knocked out.” 

“Not fine,” Remus muttered, eyes darting back and forth as if Sirius were hiding behind one of the bushes lining the front garden, “dead.”

“He isn’t dead, I swear. He’s only knocked out. Come inside, you’ll see. We need to get inside to report to Moody.” Fabian slowly let go of Remus, and together he and Alice turned to walk up the driveway to headquarters. Lily could see him send a patronus to Peter and the other members of the Support as he walked. 

Remus’ shoulders heaved with his labored breaths. He seemed to be regaining some of his lost self-control. But then he rounded on Lily, still panting. 

“What, the hell, was that, Evans?” 

Lily was stunned At Remus’ use of her last name. “Remus, I-” 

“He was your partner. Why didn’t you protect him?” 

“Remus, mate,” James interjected, “you heard Longbottom, he’s-”

“HE IS NOT FINE!” Remus bellowed at James, “He’s not fine! He could be dead or worse because you-” he pointed a finger between Lily’s eyes, “couldn’t curse your old Death Eater pal.” 

“HEY!” James advanced on Remus, drawing his wand and sticking it underneath Remus’ chin, “fucking knock it off, Remus. You’re upset, I get it, but don’t take it out on her, mate. Things happen, it wasn’t anyone’s fault.” 

“You saw her, James, she wouldn’t hex him. She let her guard down, she-” but Remus suddenly seemed to hear himself for the first time. His whole body went slack and he fell against James, sobbing into his shoulder. 

James stroked Remus’ hair and whispered “I know, I know... it’s going to be alright.” 

Remus nodded against James’ shoulder and sniffed loudly. After a few minutes of comfort he straightened up, wiping his nose on his sleeve. He turned to face Lily but could not quite meet her eyes. “Lily, I can’t believe I said that. It wasn’t your fault. Please forgive me.” 

Lily suddenly came back into her own body. She froze when Remus began to rage at her, shutting down her brain and thoughts in shock. Now, they came flooding back. He was right. 

“There’s nothing to forgive” she whispered, “it was my fault.” 

“No,” Remus cried, striding to her and grabbing her hands in his, “it wasn’t. You were shocked, you weren’t thinking, you were-” 

Lily shook her head and dropped her hands from his. “I froze, and I almost got us all killed.” 

\--

Moody informed the Order members that their intelligence had been a false plant, that there had been no meeting tonight after all. The entire mission was a waste and a failure. 

An hour later the five of them sat in front of a roaring fire in the Potters’ sitting room. James and Peter played a half-hearted game of wizard’s chess while Remus slept soundly on Sirius’ shoulder. Lily stared into the fire, trying to forget the look on Snape’s face as she pointed her want at him. It wasn’t fear or sadness, it looked more like heartbreak. 

Sirius nudged her with his foot, snapping her out of her thoughts. “You okay?” 

“I should ask you the same question,” she grimaced. Sirius had woken up not long after they arrived back at headquarters, and Alice declared him “good as new” after a dose of pepper-up potion. Sirius had insisted to the group that Lily was a brilliant partner who had his back the entire evening. No one argued. Remus rubbed Sirius’ shoulders as he spoke, his smile a little too forced. 

Sirius raised his eyebrow at Lily. “Come on, Evans, you’re not still thinking about Snivellus, are you? You know that wasn’t your fault.” 

James and Peter exchanged an awkward glance. “Peter...” said James cautiously, “let’s grab a hot chocolate or something, yeah?” 

“Righto,” agreed Peter, and the two stood up and walked toward the kitchen. 

Lily looked at Sirius. “Don’t call him that.” 

“Defending him, are we?” Sirius said lightly, “when he would have killed you in an instant if you had been any other mudblood?” 

Lily’s eyes darted back to Sirius, “I know what he is. I know he’s a-” 

“Of course you do,” Sirius waved away the rest of her thought, “you’re not angry with yourself right now because you don’t understand what Snape has become. You’re angry because you think you should have somehow known better. Well, I’m here to say that’s bullshit.” Sirius said all of this quietly as Remus still slept on his shoulder. 

Lily looked back into the fire. “You don’t understand. All my first memories of magic are with him,” Lily muttered, more to herself than to Sirius, “I can’t imagine my childhood without him. He showed me a whole world of impossible things. I can’t just forget him. Because I’ve tried, believe me. But I can’t forget his fucking face because he’s in nearly all my best memories. And he doesn’t deserve it.” 

Sirius nodded as she spoke, letting her last words hang in the air for a moment before letting out a long sigh. “Well, Evans,” he said with a mirthless laugh, “it turns out I understand you better than anyone else in the world.” 

Lily gaped at him. “I’m sorry, don’t you hate Snape more than anyone?” 

Sirius regarded her with amusement. “Not Snape, dolt, my dear family. For eleven years I accepted all the mania, the superiority complex. I lapped up every lie they told me like it was water and I was dying of thirst,” he spat, growing more agitated as he spoke. “I thought if I played the part of the good heir they would love me better. Ha. Well, they did for a little while, at least until I went to Hogwarts and got sorted into Gryffindor. You see Evans, I hate them, but they’re so much of who I am. And so sometimes, when I let my guard down, I end up hating myself too.” 

He fixed her now with such an intense stare that she felt suddenly self conscious. “I understand exactly how hard it is to fight the other side of this war. You fight your childhood friend, I fight my brother, my parents, my cousins, and it seems everyone loses.” 

Lily knew he was right. Their childhoods could not have looked more different, yet they both understood what it was like to feel gut wrenching betrayal. Her eyes filled with tears.

“Sirius, I’m so sorry” she sobbed, “I almost got you killed tonight, when I saw it was him I completely froze. I almost got one of my best friends killed because I couldn’t do what was necessary.” 

Sirius smiled sadly. “It’s okay, Red, you’ve saved my ass on more than one occasion. I’d say we’re square.” He reached out to cup her cheek gently. “Just promise me one thing. Next time we see the bastard, promise me you’ll blow him away?” 

Lily gave a watery chuckle. “I promise, no mercy.” 

“‘Atta girl.”


End file.
